Author Archives: james

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About james

hoyden will follow the free tendencies of desire hoyden is a pill dropped in a glass of water hoyden is an illusion on a surface of memory hoyden is a finger resting on the controls of a broken machine hoyden turns as she pleases toward all horizons hoyden is perfect sadism, at least as a method hoyden is a beautiful chimera hoyden crouches to intercept shadows hoyden is not in the habit of saluting the dead hoyden will always find buyers hoyden is at most a thinking reed hoyden writes sad and ardent love letters hoyden is a door someone opened hoyden is a dark intention hoyden never waits for itself hoyden leaves an exquisite corpse

On the road again….

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I just a few days I will be on my way to Warsaw. Poland.

Fourteen hours of travel to get there. Airplane, wait, airplane, wait, airplane. And Bam! I’m in Poland. I love seeing new places, but over the years I have lost my love of airplane travel. There are parts of it that I quite enjoy, and I think if I could just fly the plane I’d be fine. Dunno how the other people on the plane would feel about that….

It’ll be a fascinating trip full of history and family and sadness. My mom is meeting me there and among other places, we will visit Sobibor which will be intense.

I thought about creating a different blog site to document this journey, but I decided to post here. I’ll keep updated as often as possible, so visit frequently or sign up for email notifications (also see the “Categories” at bottom of main page for “Poland”).

dreams to reality

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I haven’t been making any progress on my RD project lately because I’ve been working on getting my massage therapy business off the ground. Please check out my website: Downshift Massage.

I’ve been doing massage since 1996 and am looking forward to re-exploring this other passion – the human body and health care.

fantasy vs. reality

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When faced with fantasy becoming reality, I’ve noticed that a lot of people tend to shy away, at least at first. It seems that there is a fear to getting what you want.

A friend of mine recently bought a motorcycle that he’d been dreaming about getting for many months. One day last week, he idly called the dealership and asked if they happened to have one. He was taken aback when they told him that there was one sitting right there on the showroom floor. When faced with getting what he wanted, he balked… just for a few seconds. Then he pulled out his credit card.

This ‘balking at potentially actually getting what you want’ phenomenon I’ve seen many times. Some people would rather have the fantasy than the reality. Why? Perhaps because the fantasy holds no responsibility or consequence, whereas reality does? Maybe they are afraid that the reality won’t be as good as what they imagined? Maybe they are afraid of change? Maybe they don’t know how to have something good in their life; something they have craved and desired can now be an actuality and they don’t feel they deserve it?