April 9, 2011

Parents seem like such a static thing in your life. As sure as the sun will rise in the morning (sorry for the clichéd saying. It’s too early on a Saturday morning.), your parents will be there to annoy you, love you, support or chastise you. But they will be there. Even if you have a rocky relationship with them, their presence is a constant running process behind the other noise in your mind. On some level we all understand that we are mortal, that someday we will die, but like most things to us dumb humans – until we experience it, it isn’t really real (pardon me, Emilio).

So what happens when one of them disappears from this world? The static suddenly unhinges and while the sun continues to rise, it’s luster has changed. Static becomes malleable and you are forced to face your own mortality.

Today is the fifth anniversary of my dads death. Today, there was no visible sun rise – it is raining in the desert. A fitting weather for my mood.

I have to go now. Maybe I will write more later today.